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Counsel for Young Fathers: What Every Young Father Must Know

Tips on how to be a young father

Here's one you may not have expected: for better or for worse, it never ends.

Barring tragic circumstances, you will never not be a father again. Your children may be in their 20's (as mine are), 40's or 60's they are always your children and if they need help you will be summoned. If there is not enough love in their lives, you will be summoned. If something goes horribly wrong, you will be summoned. This is not necessarily reciprocal - they have their lives to lead.

If this sounds gloomy, it isn't. My grown-ups (I still think of them as my babies, but I'm not allowed to say that) give me pride, joy, a sense of achievement and yes, sometimes, sorrow, though not despair to date.

Other things to remember:
  • your children owe you nothing, they may choose to help/respect/love you, but they are under no obligation to do so. You are.
  • Your children are not your property. You are privileged to look after them for a period and that will change you into a better person. But they belong to themselves.
  • A girl is every bit as good as a boy, who, in turn, is every bit as good as a girl. Don't try and choose, don't think you'd rather have one rather than the other.
  • You are as necessary to them as their mother. This is not to belittle the fabulous and difficult role of the mother, but you must remember this if things get difficult in your lives together.

Gloom over... they're also great fun at times and I certainly wouldn't go back.

Opinion of Bruce Bracken

Is No Sex Before Marriage a Set up For Incompatibility?

Abstinence till marriage

For us, “abstinence before marriage” did not mean that we never revealed if there was a potential medically issue that could hinder intimacy. (There wasn’t, but that’s beside the point here.)
It did not mean that we acted like we weren’t interested in each other.
It did not mean that we never brought up looking forward to our wedding night.
We conversed about our dreams, our fears, and our concerns.
Abstinence doesn’t mean hiding under a rock. Abstinence doesn’t mean denying physical functions exist. Abstinence doesn’t mean being naive. Abstinence doesn’t mean not desiring each other.
Abstinence simply means refraining from taking action on certain desires before a certain time.
Was there a tiny bit of a learning curve? Yes. But long-time married couples in delightfully happy and intensely intimate relationships will tell you they are still learning.
Provided any medical concerns are revealed - and emotional ones as well, if trauma that will be triggered by intimacy is present - before marriage, abstinence does not by default potentially harm future relations.
Abstinence, in general, delays a lifelong learning process just a little while longer.
Abstinence, at worst, will lead to false expectations and heartache - but that is due to deceit and incomplete communication, and is not primarily the fault of abstinence.
Abstinence is a wonderful path that avoids many common dangers that sex can involve. Abstinence before marriage is what many Christians believe pleases God. Abstinence can lead to a beautifully fresh intimacy that is not clouded by history or previous experiences and expectations.
Is it perfect? Nothing on this earth is.
Is it potentially beautiful? Yes.
Is it easy? No.
Here's an opinion of Elizabeth Quatro

How to Know if a Guy Likes You (especially a Dutch guy)

How a Dutch guy likes a girl

Most Dutch guys are pretty direct and straightforward. If you’re not in constant contact with this person (i.e. a classmate, colleague or already friend), you will probably meet, end up chatting/drinking the night away, he will offer to bring you home and go in for the kiss (if not already happened). If he’s a gentleman and serious, he will leave it at that and ask to see you again another day. If not, he will want to look at something in your apartment/needs to use your bathroom/want a drink (hint, hint).
It is of course different if this person is already in your social circle in one way or the other. In this case he will either just ask you out, or he will go for the ‘indirect approach’.
The indirect approach can be more or less obvious depending on character, and can take more or less time, but will consist of finding ways to spend increasingly more time with you, making lots of eye contact, smiling, physical contact, making suggestive/flirtatious remarks/jokes and striking up conversations.
For example, a classic case would be to invite you along to something with other people, or to whatever party/social event at his place, where he will clearly treat you differently as opposed to other people. He will sit very close to you, talk to you a lot and will try to find whatever pretext to spend time with you alone. For example, he finds out that you want to learn X. He can do that, and he can teach you if you want. Will tomorrow suit you? Or you like that book he has? Cool, he will lend it to you. You can bring it back anytime. When you bring it back, while you’re already there, do you want to come in for some coffee?
Generally speaking, it’s pretty clear if a Dutch guy likes you. Culturally speaking, it’s almost always the guy who takes the initiative, though it is becoming more socially acceptable for girls to take the initiative.
Things to watch out for:
  1. Guys who will tell you anything you want to hear in order to get you into bed. You’re the most beautiful girl he has ever met, you’re so special, blah, blah, blah and lots of other bullshit. It’s very, very common. Beware, beware, beware!! (Sorry Dutch guys, I know you are not all like that <3)
  2. Guys who are just being friendly. It’s not because he talks to you that he is into you. Please know the difference. It’s not hard to tell, really.
Signs that are a 100% sure he’s into you (and about to kiss you):
  1. If he put your hair behind your ear, or if in any other romantic way touches your face
  2. If he takes your hand and starts ‘stroking/rubbing it’
  3. If he’s stroking/rubbing your leg, or there is any foot/leg action going on
  4. If his hand is on your butt
  5. If you’re in the middle of a conversation, close together and he suddenly shuts up and looks like he’s going in for the kiss (of course he is).
Did I mention it’s generally pretty clear if a Dutch guy is into you? :-D
Some things most Dutch guys will (not) do, that might be weird for you if you’re from a different kind of culture:
  1. I know women from some cultures are showered with expensive gifts and trips all the time by their boyfriends. Ha! Forget it!
  2. Romance and chivalry? A Dutch guy will pick-up the check (unlike popular belief), will maybe open the door for you, but that’s kind of it. Don’t expect a Dutch guy to show up at your door with roses. Unless it’s your birthday or anniversary.
  3. Dutch guys will treat you fairly equal. Most (educated) Dutch guys know how to cook and can generally take care of themselves. They will not treat you like you’re a fragile little woman and they are the strong macho man.
  4. A date will always end with a kiss (not on the cheek ;-)). If he doesn’t go for the kiss, he’s either exceptionally socially awkward or he’s not into you. Beware, if he kisses you, it does not mean he’s serious about you. It’s just a kiss.
  5. Meeting the parents is not such a big deal. It does not mean he’s about to propose. In any case, marriage is not a considered a must anymore in general.

What's the best way to revenge on a cheating husband and his mistress

This story was shared anonymously but I find it really effective if the said mistress happens to be in a profession that accommodate this form of reaction. 

The story goes...

My husband’s bit on the side was a therapist. I booked an appointment with her under my maiden name.
I told her briefly about my concerns for my marriage and the impact on my children. She expressed empathy and saiwasd she could definately help me. I then calmly revealed who I was. She then spent a very uncomfortable 45 minute squirming around. She couldn’t eject me from the room without her colleagues finding out what she had been up to and knew that I would be leaving though the reception area.
It was therefore essential to her professional reputation that she engratiated herself with me as much as possible in the time available.
I have never seen anyone face the consequences of their behaviour quite so forcefully. I barely said another word. I didn’t have to.
And my husband? I told him that I’d been to see the woman and that we had spent an hour talking about their affair, but I did not share a single detail with him.
For a man used to having all the information and leaving me in the dark, this was very hard, he was extremely angry and very distressed at losing control of the story.
I divorced my husband and he is now in a long term relationship with this woman.
I am very glad to be single and also grateful that I had the opportunity to put myself in a position of power and confront them head on with their behaviour without so much as raising my voice or being vengeful in a way that would reflect badly on me. It has helped me to find resolution.

How to know my husband is cheating on me

I used to have an open relationship with my ex-husband.

So when I was searching to have that extra person in my life I came across many married men looking to cheat on their wives. I made a personal rule to only date men in open relationships which was clearly stated in my personal ad.

Nevertheless, it was incredible how many married men tried to have an extra-marital relationship with me. I would agree to go on dates with them as I was intrigued why men who claimed to be happily married would cheat. What I found was very interesting but I also gather this bit of information which might be helpful to few women who might be doubting:

- New underwear - If you husband was never interested in having new underwear and you see him buying Bjorn Borg boxers. That’s a HUGE sign!

- All of the sudden too many late meetings at work or too many business trips which run from or into the weekend.

- If before he didn’t use lotion and now he does

- If before he didn’t care if he shaved and now he does

- If his sexual appetite changes in an odd way: if he was before too hungry for sex and now he isn’t but also the other way around.

- If he becomes overly secretive, especially of his phone

- If the length and frequency of time he spends using his phone in the bathroom increases. Another HUGE sign!

- Tania Solis-Camara

Kylie Jenner Sports a Massive Diamond Ring on Her Left Hand — Is She Engaged?

Kylie Jenner and Travis Scott wedding

Kylie Jenner has been dating rapper Travis Scott since April, and things are definitely getting serious. Not only do they reportedly have a baby on the way, but Kylie also sent engagement rumors into overdrive over the weekend when she posted a Snapchat video of herself wearing a giant diamond ring on her left hand.
While neither Travis nor Kylie has confirmed anything, this isn't the first time she has sparked engagement rumors. Back when she was dating Tyga in 2016, Kylie showed off a similar diamond ring on Snapchat, though she later revealed that it was just a promise ring. Talk about keeping us on our toes!

Enrique Iglesias and Anna Kournikova Are Still Going Strong After 16 Years

Enrique Iglesias and Anna Kournikova kids

Enrique Iglesias and Anna Kournikova have been dating since 2001. The two met when Anna was featured in Enrique's music video for "Escape" in the same year.
The couple briefly separated in 2013 but got back together and have been going strong ever since. They have settled down in Miami and despite the split rumors, Anna and Enrique continue to do their own thing and stay quiet about their relationship, which is probably one of the secrets to how they have been together for so long. She's a badass former professional tennis player, he has the voice of an angel, and together they make the couple of our dreams. It also doesn't hurt that both of them are smoking hot (cue the fan we need to cool us down).

They are adorable, and whenever we see them out and about, our hearts skip a beat.